Creating the LALA Corporation

For the last two and a half years I’ve been living and working in Honduras on a (mostly valid) tourist visa.   Technically speaking you could say this is a mis-use of said visa which is intended for travellers (i.e. tourists) to come into the country for a period of up to 90 days, marvel the sights, spend lot of money and then depart (kindly paying the $US35 exit tax on the way out).   

I am really not the type of person to flagrantly flout immigration law.  I lived for 6 years in the US and 8 years in Switzerland and at no time were my papers in disarray.  Illegal immigration was a hot topic in both these countries with frequent government campaigns to oust the pesky (mostly) Central American, Eastern European or African laborer stealing jobs, inciting crime and generally thumbing their noses at the cultural conventions held dear by the country’s rightful citizens.  When I considered them at all (usually when in the market for a new house keeper) I guess I saw illegal immigrant workers as pretty desperate individuals for whom living a kind of shadowy sub-existence in a foreign country was infinitely preferable to whatever horrors or misery they had left behind in their own.  I never imagined I would become one myself.

But yep, here I am, an illegal alien in Honduras.  Working, without papers, for cash paid under the table.  No health benefits, pension plan or employment rights.   And I’m not alone.  There are quite a few of us here.  Desperate escapees from the first world who couldn’t take any more the torture of consistent employment, 401K’s, car insurance and 24/7 shopping malls.  We came seeking a better life in which there is no requirement to wear shoes, EVER.   We work as dive instructors, waiters, bartenders and resort activity directors.  We cluster together in bars sharing black-market know-how such as how to renew the 90-day tourist visa without actually leaving the country.  In a bizarre reversal of the classic border crossing scene (desperate Mexican entering the US on foot under a barrage of spotlights and bullets) we run the gauntlet trying to leave Honduras sometimes with a tourist visa that’s more than 2 years out of date. 

Fortunately (for us) the Honduran Government treats the situation somewhat more benignly than the US and nearly every infringement of immigration law can be remedied by a payment of some kind (some legit, some not so much).  Both the Honduran officials and Honduran citizens are (for the most part) accepting of the illegal worker situation and recognize the benefits it brings to the local economy.  We (the illegal immigrants) work in tourist facing roles and understand the service expectations of the North American and European traveller and have the skills (language and otherwise) to satisfy them.  Hopefully this results in a positive service experience for the visitor who comes back the following year, bringing their friends.  Nearly always we are working side-by-side with Hondurans so there is an informal transfer of knowledge and skills which contribute to a local population being overall better equipped to serve the ever-growing tourism sector.  Meanwhile we (the illegals) get to stay living and working in paradise.  It’s beneficial to both sides and to my knowledge frictions rarely occur.   

However idyllic I have found this arrangement, it’s all about to change.  Starting LALA means I have to go legit and form a Honduran corporation.  It is (perhaps unsurprisingly) pretty easy to go from tourist to Honduran business owner as long as you have the right people to guide you and about $US 5,000.  I have hired an attorney (a very nice man who makes me feel in good hands despite or because of somehow reminding me of Joe Pesci) who has the incorporation process well underway and an accountant/business manager who will obtain the necessary business permits and tax registrations on my behalf.  The whole process should take about 4-6 week to complete.  The company will be a limited liability corporation in which I hold 98% of the shares and a Honduran citizen (someone from the firm of my attorney) holds 2%.   I pony up 25,000 lempiras (about $US1,250) in operating capital, pay for the business permits and…. that’s about it really.  I start to be a tax payer again.   No doubt there will be some to and fro with the Municipal but it all seems pretty straight forward.

With that task in hand I can move my attention to other items on the project plan.  Tomorrow I will work on the interior design of the gallery in preparation for meeting with my builder, Orville Miller, on Friday.  Also I need to prepare for leaving on my big buying trip this weekend.  Then the fun starts – shopping!  Stay tuned……

Oh PS.  Check out my logo.  What do you think?